Summer Bloggin’ Day 38: Existential frustration
The thing I like least about life, is the perpetuum; the fact that there’s never a moment in which everything is DONE. I guess this is why I like photography so much: it’s shot, it’s fixed, it’s DONE. Unlike in real life, where there’s always something else that needs doing or something new popping up. Most days I just try to do the things that are on my to do list and not think about it too much, but on days like today it just gets to me.
It feels like I’m constantly trying to catch up on things, never able to finish up anything, and even if I do, there’s still always an increasing amount of stuff I need to do. Dishes are never done, there’s always stuff that needs to be washed, rooms that need to be cleaned, hair that needs to be washed/cut/dyed/done, phones that need to be charged, issues that need to be solved, books that need to be read, projects that need to be finished, groceries that need to be done, pills that need to be taken, prescriptions that need to be filled, and today I’m just really, really tired of it all.
It’s not a “Make a schedule! Write a bucket list! Have a to do list!”-thing, on the contrary, I feel like my life is ruled by to do lists, bucket lists, and schedules. I feel like the rabbit in Alice in Wonderland, going “I’m late! I’m late!” and not even knowing what I’m late for. I’m probably just having an “I will never be able to get everything TOGETHER AND DONE in my life, EVER!”-existential crisis and it will surely pass at some point. But right now, it sure is tiring. *goes off to bed*